Past newsletters 2003

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Plain English update 30 May 2003

Several of the business diary columns in the national press mentioned a baffling press release this week which ran as follows.

'Deutsche Bank Global Markets' London-based Product Innovation Group has implemented Prediction Dynamics' Crucible as a platform for researching and deploying innovative quantitative trading strategies. The quantitative trading infrastructure software will enable the bank to very quickly implement sophisticated non-parametric financial trading strategies for its growing client base.'

A study for the Department for Transport suggests labels on over-the-counter medicines may not be clear enough to avoid traffic accidents caused by drowsiness.

The study found that warnings were inconsistent: different manufacturers would give different information for products containing the same active ingredient. And in some cases, the information on the packaging would be different to the information on the patient information leaflet.

Loughborough University's Sleep Research Unit, which carried out the study, said the visibility of the labels was often inadequate, and suggested a standard symbol for drowsiness warnings should be considered.

We've seen some horrendous legal notices on websites. And direct marketers often produce some incredible waffle. So we were very surprised to see a perfectly clear copyright warning on a website about producing marketing letters (www.thegaryhalbertletter.com).

The warning is so clear, we were almost afraid to reproduce it for you...

'Don't even think about reproducing and/or selling... even one sentence... of these letters in any form whatsoever. They are all copyrighted and, if you do rip them off, I guarantee you will have a 'legal experience' so unpleasant... it will give you nightmares forever!'

Plain English update 23 May 2003

We have added four more special training courses to our 2003 calendar. They are all one-day events taking place in London.

• Report writing (Thursday 6 November)
• Writing medical information in plain English (Thursday 20 November)
• Plain English and forms design (Thursday 27 November)
• Advanced Grammar (Thursday 4 December)

For more details on any of the courses, please call our training manager Helen Mayo on 01663 744409.

The European Court ruled this week that ham from Parma is not always 'Parma ham'. The case involved British supermarket Asda, which imported ham from Italy but sliced and packaged it in the United Kingdom. The Court ruled that the slicing and packaging was part of the process that gave the meat its 'quality and authenticity'.

A loophole means that, while Asda now cannot sell packets of sliced 'Parma ham', they can slice a 'Parma ham' in front of the customer in a delicatessen counter.

'Parma ham' is registered under the European Union's rules which protect about 500 regional product names such as Stilton cheese and Newcastle Brown Ale. However, many products, such as Cheddar cheese and Eccles cakes are not covered. This is because they were already widely produced outside their named region when the rules took force in 1992.

There was good news and bad news for lovers of plain-speaking when Michael Foot, a managing director at the Financial Services Authority, addressed a seminar this week.

The good news is that he was perfectly unambiguous when he stated that there is 'a great deal of money-laundering going on throughout the UK.'

The bad news is that he then described this situation as 'highly sub‑optimal'.

We think Education Secretary Charles Clarke announced this week that he wants schoolchildren to learn faster. We're not sure though. He actually said 'We want schools to aim to add more value every year.'

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Plain English update 16 May 2003

At times we think local authorities might be having a contest to come up with the most baffling committee title.

It started with Trafford Metropolitan Borough Council's notice about a 'MEETING OF THE COMMUNITY SAFETY AND NEIGHBOURHOOD SAFETY/HUMAN RESOURCES SPOKESPERSON DECISION GROUP MEETING AS A SUB-COMMITTEE.'

Rotherham Council then came up with a 'Support for Vulnerable People and Creating Revitalised, Inclusive and Safe Communities Scrutiny Panel'.

Now we hear Staffordshire County Council has a 'Supporting Peoples Shadow Commissioning Body Member Board'...

Can you guess which car the Times motoring correspondent is describing in this extract from today's newspaper?

'For the record, the 5-series is not only pioneering AFS but offers BFD along with ACC with DCS, which uses DTC and ASC. DVD is, of course, an essential, but what about PDC and don't forget the new biVanos qualifies for ULEVII in the US. Just to recap for those of you still ploughing your way through that maze of letters, the 5-series press pack reminds us helpfully: 'As soon as the car leaves the DTC range, the control unit will automatically switch to the normal DCS/ACS mode, then, however, switching back to DTC as soon as the car re-enters the DTC range.''

Perhaps inevitably, the car concerned is... a BMW.

Those in the British legal system who begrudge replacing old Latin terms with modern English equivalents will be pleased to hear about a new publication from the Vatican's Latinatis Foundation.

The 728-page 'Lexicon Recentis Latinitatis' dictionary gives Latin versions of 23,000 terms including:

• escariorum lavator (dishwasher);
• capsellarum magnetoscopicarum theca (video rental shop); and
• pastillum botello fartum (hot dog).

We're sure many of you have come across the argument that plain English is a bad thing because it involves 'dumbing down' the language.

We'll leave you this week with a wonderful response to that argument. It came from Janet Pringle, a speaker at last year's Plain Language Association International conference in Toronto.

'I am always careful to point out I am not desecrating any classics, but I am seriously involved in communicating information and that this information has no value unless it is understood. I suggest that we are not 'dumbing down' buildings when we include wheelchair ramps, even though many of us don't need them.'

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Plain English update 9 May 2003

Medical experts across the United States have formed a group to improve communication between doctors and patients. The 'Partnership for Clear Health Communication' (PFCHC) includes high-profile groups such as the American Medical Association and the American Public Health Association.

The new group has launched a website (www.askme3.org). The name that comes from research suggesting most patients have three main questions for doctors.

• What is my main problem?
• What do I need to do?
• Why is it important for me to do this?

A PFCHC guide explains that there are four main types of term that cause confusion among patients:

• medical jargon (such as dysfunction or lesion);
• unfamiliar words for concepts (such as collaborate or gauge);
• unfamiliar categories (such as generic); and
• value or judgement words (such as cautiously or excessive).

To mark the occasion, PFCHC named 7 May as a national 'Day of Understanding'. As well as encouraging doctors to communicate clearly, the group aims to encourage patients to not feel ashamed to ask questions.

In our guide to design and layout, we recommend using at least 10 point size text, and preferably 12 point. The Royal National Institute for Blind people recommends using at least 14 point if you know the readers are likely to have visual impairments. We also suggest that, assuming the document follows all the other principles of plain English and design, fonts such as Arial are easiest to read.

Bearing this in mind, we were interested to read in the gossip columns this week that President George Bush's speechwriters have begun using 16 point Arial text. Perhaps this will help avoid embarrassing slips such as the time Mr Bush, intending to announce his opposition to tariffs and barriers, mistakenly promised 'to end terriers'.

As much as we enjoy trying to decipher certain types of gobbledygook, there comes a point where we have to admit defeat. During a clearout of our files this week, we came across a classified advert from the Manchester Evening News from 1998. The listed telephone number was out of service at the time so we couldn't get an explanation that way.

So, would any of our readers know what to do with a 'Post Neo-Classical Iscilliscope (Predidatic) with electro pernatic Gurgun flap display (EGD) with crymofutic sound modulator (WCSSM)'?

We'll leave you with this thought from 'Futurist and Entrepreneur' Don Scott (thanks to reader Nigel Graber for sending it to us):

'The Internet is emerging as a new infrastructure that is changing the way we orchestrate capability.'

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Plain English update 2 May 2003

Currys has agreed to drop advertising claims that the Office of Fair Trading (OFT) considered misleading. The company had deals allowing the customer to have a product delivered immediately without paying any money up-front. After a certain time (such as six months) they could either pay off the full price (with no interest charges), or they could begin paying by instalments (with interest added). However, the adverts did not make clear that in the latter case, the interest would be charged from the date they bought the product, not the date they began paying instalments.

A total of 11 companies have made similar agreements with the OFT in the past two years.

Thanks to the OFT's powers, the Currys case didn't have to go to court. Had the situation come up in Illinois, things might not have been so simple. One of our readers sent us the following opening clause from the state's Deceptive Advertising Act:

'Sec. 1a. Any person, firm, corporation or association or agent or employee thereof, who, with intent to sell, purchase, or in any wise dispose of, or to contract with reference to merchandise, securities, real estate, service, employment, money, credit or anything offered by such person, firm, corporation or association, or agent or employee thereof, directly or indirectly, to the public for sale, purchase, loan, distribution, or the hire of personal services, or with intent to increase the consumption of or to contract with reference to any merchandise, real estate, securities, money, credit, loan, service or employment, or to induce the public in any manner to enter into any obligation relating thereto, or to acquire title thereto, or an interest therein, or to make any loan, makes, publishes, disseminates, circulates, or places before the public, or causes, directly or indirectly, to be made, published, disseminated, circulated, or placed before the public, in this State, in a newspaper, magazine, or other publication, or in the form of a book, notice, handbill, poster, sign, bill, circular, pamphlet, letter, placard, card, label, or over any radio or television station, or in any other way similar or dissimilar to the foregoing, an advertisement, announcement, or statement of any sort regarding merchandise, securities, real estate, money, credit, service, employment, or anything so offered for use, purchase, loan or sale, or the interest, terms or conditions upon which such loan will be made to the public, which advertisement contains any assertion, representation or statement of fact which is untrue, misleading or deceptive, shall be guilty of a Class A misdemeanor.'

Presumably there must be some logical or legal difference between the expressions:

'in a newspaper, magazine, or other publication, or in the form of a book, notice, handbill, poster, sign, bill, circular, pamphlet, letter, placard, card, label, or over any radio or television station, or in any other way similar or dissimilar to the foregoing'

and simply

'in any way'.

Timeshare agreements have produced much confusion in the past, and the relevant legislation has seemed to defy clear explanation. But at least the name was catchy.

According to one newspaper, the Marriott group is now offering 'fractional ownership residences.'

It appears Daily Mail writer Quentin Letts is becoming a little frustrated with his Parliamentary work:

'Take the following words: bureaucratic, robust, regulation, impact, assessment, measure, audit. Throw in an 'assure', maybe a 'Right Honourable Friend', a 'Government', 'committed', 'strategy' and 'implementation.'

'Now add a watery smile, give the words a good, long shake and say them again in whatever order you desire.

'Done it? Good. You now know just about everything you need to know about yesterday's Trade and Industry Questions in the Commons.'

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