Past newsletters 2003

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Plain English update 27 June 2003

A new piece of software released this week aims to weed out business jargon. Bullfighter, produced by Deloitte Consulting, searches Microsoft Word and PowerPoint documents for common meaningless 'buzzwords', and also works out a 'Bull index' for the document.

The Independent on Sunday used the software to assess the jargon in documents from Britain's biggest companies. Barclays Bank were the worst offenders according to the assessment, with pharmaceutical firm AstraZeneca judged the plainest-speaking firm.Our spokesman John Lister told the BBC that Bullfighter would help raise the issue of business communication. 'It is not a case of saying run this software and you will be speaking in perfect, plain English. There is a lot more to it than that. Jargon and gobbledygook are like an addiction. The first step is admitting you have a problem.'

Nine of our youngest campaigners have produced guidelines for cosmetics manufacturers to produce clearer instructions. The group, led by 12-year-old Rebecca Brown (Chrissie Maher's granddaughter), tested the instructions on a range of make-up products, concentrating on those marketed in magazines for teenagers. The group's conclusions were as follows.

Put the safety warnings first as they are the most important information.

• Use photographs to give people a better idea of how the results should look if the product is used properly.
• Give clear details of how much of the product to use.
• Don't use uncommon words if an everyday alternative will do just as well.
• Mention on the box if there is anything else you need to have before you can use the product.

'We're not asking for everything to be written in baby talk,' Rebecca explained. 'We just want the people writing the instructions to remember that not everyone is an expert on how to use the products.?

A survey by the Mail on Sunday has found that 96% of endowment mortgage customers claim salesmen did not explain the risk that the policy might not pay off their mortgages. The newspaper said 'Failing to spell out the risks associated with an endowment (in other words, mis-selling) is the main reason for most compensation awards from insurers or independent advisers.'

We find references to Plain English Campaign in some very strange places. This week we came across an internet newsgroup where Dr Who fans work together to write their own science fiction stories. One of them, apparently set in the distant future, contains the following passage:

Eloise opened the box's lid, and looked inside, before looking back up into Amber's face. '...A camera?'

'A holo-camera.' Amber said. 'It takes 2-D pictures - like a normal camera - and 3-D pictures - holograms - and saves them all in memory to develop later.'

'...Thank you.' Eloise said, taking the box; she'd need to put it somewhere safe. 'I've been looking for something like this.'

'Plus' Amber added, 'it comes with a manual approved by the Plain English Campaign, so you can actually understand it. You wouldn't believe the trouble I had finding one of those...'

Florestan raised an eyebrow. 'I see some things never change...'

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Plain English update 20 June 2003

According to the Financial Times, new Culture Secretary Tessa Jowell has taken an instant dislike to jargon used in a joint workshop between the Culture and Education departments.

At a meeting this week she recalled the 'deadening language' used, condemning such terms as:

• validation;
• strategic objectives;
• skill-sharing;
• making masterplans;
• shared agendas; and
• benchmarking.

One of our supporters has invited attempts to explain a recent internal e-mail. The message referred to a new head of product marketing who, apparently, 'will cross functionally integrate to formulate our product strategy and specifically vertical specific application content.'

A survey of 10,000 people suggests consumers in the United States will not stand for financial jargon. The study by the 'Finsight' panel found that 82.4% of people made a particular point of reading terms and conditions, while 89.1% said more plain English was needed.

Ohio health insurance firm Kaiser Pemanente has fired two employees after allegations that they cheated on a plain language assessment. The National Committee for Quality Assurance was checking the firm's insurance schemes for accreditation. Among their checks was a calculation of whether documents achieved a particular 'readability' statistic.

The employees lost their jobs after claims that they had not given the assessors genuine letters to clients. Instead they produced faked versions that had been rewritten to artificially improve the 'readability' score.

The Office of Fair Trading has reported on several more cases where it has persuaded firms to replace unclear contract terms. Under the Unfair Contract Terms Regulations 1999, firms cannot rely on clauses that are not 'in plain and intelligible language'. Among the terms that firms have now either scrapped or explained are:

• joint and several liability;
• thereof without prejudice;
• indemnify;
• [a tenancy being] determined;
• [a tenant being asked to] yield up [the premises]
• dilapidations; and
• term certain.

It's often been said that if you find yourself writing a phrase without thinking about it, it's probably become a tired cliché. So on behalf of clear communicators everywhere, can we please appeal to journalists to stop using the terms 'sexed up' or 'road map' in anything other than their literal sense!

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Plain English update 13 June 2003

As the saying goes, there's good news and bad news. The good news is that a public figure, asked about the debate over Britain and the Euro said this week:

'I am all for a campaign for plain English so we understand where the Government stands.'

The bad news is that it wasn't a politician or civil servant. Rather it was Graham Sharpe, the spokesman for bookmakers William Hill. And it seems odds-on that he may be in for a long wait. The Treasury's assessment of the Euro, published this week, has 18 volumes and around 1700 pages. Weary journalists could only pick out random extracts and admit defeat. The Times chose:

'Path dependency means that clusters can persist for long periods of time, even when initial cause for their development is no longer an explanatory factor for their current position.'

Keith Waterhouse of the Daily Mail pleaded 'Let's just have it in plain English, if possible leaving out expressions like sustainable convergence...'

And his colleague Quentin Letts described Gordon Brown's speech to Parliament on the subject as 'like listening to a speeded-up Esperanto Linguaphone tape. Pinky and Perky, the Open University years.'

No doubt the Treasury documents are far more comprehensible to their intended audience of economists. And we haven't heard of any ministers admitting to confusion. But it is crystal-clear that both sides of the debate are going to have to make a dedicated effort to explain the issues in plain English before the public can make an informed decision in any referendum.

A journalist has asked our supporters to hunt down any examples of public-sector jargon for a regular series. If you come across any possibilities, please send them to us and we'll pass them on. We won't pass on your name unless you ask us to.

Thanks to reader Bronwyn Boltwood for telling us about an essay by science fiction writer Robert A Heinlein. In 'Over the Rainbow', the President of the United States asks Uncle Sam how he would like to be thanked for his help. He asks for a 'Plain English Amendment' to the US Constitution, requiring all laws to be written in terms that any person of average intelligence can understand.

A couple of months ago we wrote about a scam where a text message asked people to call a number to claim a prize. The message ended with 'aclx150pm', which was not the clearest way of mentioning that calling the number would cost £1.50 a minute.

This week the Independent Committee for the Supervision of Standards of Telephone Information Services (ICSTIS), the organisation that regulates premium-rate phone services, said they had received 1210 complaints about such messages during 2002. This was up by almost 800% from 2001. ICSTIS will now be making it a priority to force such messages to include clear, accurate information about the cost of calling the number concerned.

Talking of clear pricing information with phone calls, we saw an advert this week that either has a typing error or is extremely honest. The advert warned people planning to phone for a copy of the Edinburgh Festival fringe programme that 'calls cost approx £250 p&p'.

We've heard many cases where medical jargon has left people with no idea what a doctor is talking about. But this week we heard about a case with a different problem: misunderstanding.

According to the Times, an employee from an accident and emergency department was transferred to work on a hospital ward. After reading a set of medical notes, he told a patient's relative: 'I'm terribly sorry but your mother was dead on arrival'.

Unfortunately the employee had not realised that, unlike in accident and emergency, DOA stood for 'Date Of Admission'.

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Plain English update 6 June 2003

Most financial firms do not understand government regulations that affect their business. A survey for the 'Small Business Practitioner Panel' of the Financial Services Authority (FSA) found that just 1 in 7 firms thought the FSA's Handbook of Rules and Guidance was clear and easy to understand.

In their annual report, published this week, the panel said this was a particular problem for small firms because they could not afford full-time experts on the regulations, and this meant they were more reliant on the handbook. They explained that 'It is one thing to make an amendment to the Handbook, it is quite another to educate those affected in both the letter and, equally importantly, the meaning of that change.'

We're starting to think people have other things on their mind while looking around our website. This week's contenders for the strangest terms typed into our search engine are 'losing weight' and 'summer evenings'. We were also a little confused to find that, according to the website alexa.com, people who visited our site and then later used internet bookstore amazon.com were most likely to buy:

• The Indispensable Guide to Classic Men's Clothing by Josh Karlen; and
• A Gentleman's Guide to Appearance by Clinton T. Greenleaf III

We can only assume some incurable wafflers believe a Golden Bull is such a likelihood that they are preparing for the awards ceremony already.

An English judge has described rap music lyrics as 'for practical purposes a foreign language'. Mr Justice Lewison made his comments during a dispute in which one group complained that another group had taken its record and added new lyrics which dealt with drugs and violence.

The judge said the claim had caused 'the faintly surreal experience of three gentlemen in horsehair wigs (himself and two barristers) examining the meaning of such phrases as 'mish mish man''. (The phrase translates as 'an unpopular or unintelligent man'.)

To help him make his decision, the judge consulted an on-line 'urban dictionary' and found several definitions for terms such as 'for shizzle my nizzle' ('that is for sure, my friend), but concluded they were not drug references.

The defending barrister argued that without expert translation, any evidence that the lyrics referred to drugs was inadmissable. Agreeing with this, the judge said 'the occasions on which an expert drug dealer might be called to give evidence in the [High Court] are likely to be rare.'

Following our piece last week about a particuarly clear legal disclaimer, our thanks go to long-time supporter Dominic Minett of Sao Paulo, Brazil. He uncovered the site www.lectlaw.com, which provides free model legal forms. However, the site has a clear warning for non-lawyers:

'Don't even think about using these unless you know what the hell you're doing (not that most lawyers do).'

There is also a warning for anyone who uses the forms:

'...if you use the Library's material for whatever purpose and, due to our completely negligent and idiotic error, you are embarrassed, imprisoned, bankrupted, flunked, deported, divorced, molested, castigated, outcast, crucified, sickened, beaten, drowned, excommunicated, ridiculed or elected to high public office - don't bitch to us about it.'

A corporate image consultant has suggested several ways of avoiding unpopular job titles. 'Certain job titles undoubtedly come with a poor conceived image, so using a little artistic licence to help overcome first impressions is fairly harmless,' Martin Mason said in a Daily Mail article. 'But be careful when you come to your CV: too much embroidery may lead to you getting found out.'

Some of his suggestions seem sensible enough. 'I'm a government agent' replaces tax inspector, while 'I work with animals' may be useful for rat catchers. However, we are a bit more dubious about 'I work at the cutting edge of the food industry' (slaughterhouse worker) and 'I'm an exit strategist' (undertaker).

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